'It's a Wonderful Knife' Movie Review: A Queer Christmas Slasher That Truly Slays
The first week of November can be rough for us Halloween stans, but this year, the It’s a Wonderful Knife movie comes to bridge the gap between spooky season, and "the most wonderful time of the year.” It’s a Wonderful Knife is like Scream meets, well, It’s a Wonderful Life. It’s a slasher meets Hallmark movie meets Christmas classic. And it is an instant classic, worthy to be screened among other holiday horror favorites, like Black Christmas, Gremlins, and Krampus.
It comes from writer Michael Kennedy (Freaky) and director Tyler MacIntyre (Tragedy Girls), so you know the tone is on point and hilarious, with a warm, gooey center. It’s a Wonderful Knife follows Winnie Carruthers (played by Yellowjackets’ Jane Widdop) who saves her small, idyllic hometown of Angel Falls by taking out a literal serial killer, but still manages to feel that powerful imposter syndrome. The killer is masterfully played by Justin Long, who found inspiration for his villainous mayor/realtor in televangelist Joel Osteen.
Mayor Henry Waters reminded me of a mashup of Osteen and Tim Allen’s character from Christmas with the Kranks - after he gets bad botox and a tan. He’s one of those guys who uses designer clothes and a chipper demeanor to get away with saying the most inappropriate, and, at times, bone-chilling things. His TV commercial literally says, “I’m the best, so f**k the rest. Tell ‘em Henry sent you.”
For Winnie, who begins the film too wholesome to say the “f word,” Mayor Waters is not just a corrupt political figure, but also her dad’s boss, who seems to relish pulling him away from his family, even on Christmas Eve. The very important business? Bullying an old man to give away the house that has been in his family for generations so that Henry can build a mall better than The Grove. In an interview with Kennedy and MacIntyre, the latter said of the character, “I just love that idea that the small town guy who has the huckster real estate, the Hallmark villain, just goes nuts and kills a bunch of people because he can't build his mall.”
The beginning of It’s a Wonderful Knife is like the ending of most horror films. We find out who the killer is, there’s a big showdown with the final girl, and the town is saved! Of course, killing the villain doesn’t undo all of the damage that he has created. Most horror films end on the vaguely happy note - we survived! - but don’t touch upon the massive trauma such an ordeal would cause a person. Winnie is technically a hero, but she also has survivor’s guilt after the loss of her best friend, Cara (Hana Huggins), and what I imagine to be the unbearable weight of knowing that she has ended another person’s life, evil as he may have been.
Her parents handle trauma the way most parents to people in my generation do, which is to just bury all emotions and pretend it didn’t happen. That isn’t working for Winnie, and it isolates her from just about everyone. As the deep-feeler in my family, it’s far too easy to relate, and Widdop plays Winnie with such genuine emotion that it’s impossible not to feel for her. Winnie’s not alone in having the holiday blues though, as classmate Bernie struggles with an absent mother and an entire town full of people who call her Weirdo rather than her own name.
I cannot stress enough how absolutely phenomenal Jess McCleod is as Bernie. The character is multifaceted and believable, and McCleod plays her as meek, charming, resilient, and hilarious. There are a number of Bernie’s one-liners on this list of memorable quotes from It’s a Wonderful Knife. In one particularly poignant scene, when Bernie is finally acknowledged in a way she’s been wanting her entire life, McCleod wells up with tears and not only did it give me goosebumps, but it reminded me of a time my therapist did something similar. We are worthy. We matter. It may seem like a cheesy thing to say, but sometimes hearing it is the most powerful thing in the world.
And they absolutely nailed that scene. I’ve watched the movie multiple times at this point, and every time I am so moved by McCleod’s work. Who cries watching a slasher Christmas movie? I do now, thanks to Kennedy and McCleod. The on-screen chemistry between McCleod and Widdop is electric, so much so that it altered the trajectory of the script. The two of them will fight their way into your heart, just like Mikayla (Alexandra Shipp) and Sadie (Brianna Hildebrand) did in Tragedy Girls.
After a particularly rough day, drowning in guilt, Winnie decides everyone would be better off without her, and wishes as much on the quite magical Aurora Borealis. Like George Bailey in its inspiration, Winnie is about to find out just how desperately wrong she is. In doubting herself and what she has to offer, she fails to realize that her never existing means she never stopped the killer, so even more Angel Falls citizens have lost their lives, and a bad man has become more powerful, feared, and unchecked.
“The Angel,” as the killer is known, is literally dressed like a slasher-movie version of the common Christmas tree topper. The eerily smooth and shiny mask is reminiscent of an all-white version of the Brandon James mask from the Scream TV series, and the white costume not only works symbolically, turning a symbol of hope and celebration into a holiday Grim Reaper, but also visually. Watching the pearly white costume covered in the reddest of blood while Christmas lights flash and a remix of "Carol of the Bells" plays is a perfect example of why we need more Christmas horror movies. MacIntyre’s touch can be seen throughout the film, in stylized kill scenes that you’ll want to watch again and again. The combination of Kennedy’s words and MacIntyre’s direction is true horror comedy gold.
This movie is a love letter to both classic horror films and beloved Christmas movies. An unfortunate pink tracksuit Christmas present is a killer callback to the “pink nightmare” bunny suit from A Christmas Story, and a staircase scene where characters must step over the knocked-out killer to escape pays homage to one of my favorite parts of Scream 2. Other notable nods include Katharine Isabelle of Ginger Snaps playing the cool gay aunt I wish I had growing up, and the fact that her character’s name happens to be Gale Prescott.
One of the best parts? This movie is so damn queer. Winnie's brother Jimmy (Aiden Howard) is gay (which his mother acknowledges with a rainbow Christmas tree ornament), and Influencer’s Cassandra Naud stars as Gale’s partner. It’s not preachy, and there's no queer-baiting. The feelings between Bernie and Winnie are so authentic and exciting that a kiss had me screaming at the screen like most people cheer on a sports team. Love is just love, but no one is safe from the Angel’s blade.
It's a Wonderful Knife is a profound exploration of grief, survivor's guilt, and what happens when you don't process your trauma, all wrapped up in the most fun and gory horror film. Everyone is acting at their very best, and the script is so tight. It is obvious in viewing the film that Kennedy and MacIntyre are huge fans of both horror and Christmas films, and they've done a skillful job combining the two in a way that should please genre fans.
Whether you're looking for a queer holiday movie with an outcome that isn't infuriating (ahem, Happiest Season), a creative slasher, or a Hallmark movie with a twist, It's a Wonderful Knife is a satisfying blend to scratch every itch. I honestly can't say enough good things about this movie, which hits theaters November 10th, 2023, and Shudder at a later date.
